“It was dusk. I could tell because the sun was going down.”

Roger Corman started making movies in 1955. Unfortunately, in 1961 he made “Creature from the Haunted Sea”. You know you are going to watch crap when the first shot of the movie is a guy getting his shoes shined and he’s wearing sneakers.

Racketeer and gambler Renzo Capetto has a get rich quick scheme during the Cuban Revolution. He agrees to take a group of Cuban loyalists headed by General Tostada on his yacht along with Cuba’s national treasury which they plan on using to finance a counterrevolution.

On board the yacht is inept American secret agent XK-150 alias Sparks Moran. His plan is to find out what the gang is up to and report back. He also is the narrator of the movie. Also on board are Renzo’s girlfriend Mary-Belle, her brother Happy Jack and a homicidal moron named Pete Peterson who constantly does animal impressions.

Renzo plans to steal the gold and kill the loyalists blaming it on a mythical sea creature. The mythical “Creature from the Haunted Sea”. In reality it would be Renzo and his mismatched band that would do the killing. His plan is to use a clawed garden hand rake and leave footprints made by a toilet plunger and a mixture of olive oil and green ink. Unfortunately for Renzo there is a real sea creature in the same waters. The sea monster starts killing more people than Renzo planned so now he needs a new plan. Renzo decides to scuttle the boat off the shore of a small island and retrieve the gold later.

Things get a little complicated when members of Renzo’s gang start getting romantically involved with some of the native inhabitants of the island. As for agent XK-150 he is so incompetent that he has been unable to find anything out. Plus, he is smitten with Renzo’s girlfriend Mary-Belle, but she is totally uninterested. Oh, Good Lord. You don’t need to know any more. The Monster attacks. The monster kills just about everybody. The End.

It’s supposed to be a comedy horror movie but everyone in it is just stupid and inept. The monster is a guy wearing a wet suit covered in moss and brillo pads, tennis balls for eyes and ping pong balls for pupils. His claws were made of pipe cleaners. I have no idea what the teeth were made of. Then he was covered with black oilcloth to make him slimy. OK very innovative, I can let that go. The score was the same one used in “The Wasp Woman” “Little Shop of Horrors” and a few other Corman movies. I believe seven movies in all. That’s fine. I liked all those movies too. The movie was then promoted as a horror movie instead of a comedy which hurt it at the box office. Boo Hoo.

The reason we have “Creature from the Haunted Sea” is because Roger had some unused footage left over from “The Last Woman on Earth” and if he “manufactured” in Puerto Rico, and this included movies, then there were tax incentives he could take advantage of. So, Roger decided to make another movie. Ta! Da! “Creature from the Haunted Sea”. It was written in three days and filmed in 5 days. Was it the worst movie I’ve ever seen? Oh, probably not. There were some funny parts, to the point of being goofy. I would even say that I was OK with it. Although I had to watch it twice to appreciate its nuance of absolute moronic stupidity.

If you are a Roger Corman fan. Or if you like old stupid or old crappy movies. Or you like comedy horror movies that have been whipped up in 5 days then you might fine this one tolerable. I know Roger would thank you.

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